By Maureen
Bennie
It's that time of year again - the holiday season.
Everyone is busy shopping for Christmas gifts, the
malls are packed, company is coming to your house,
school is out, presents need to be wrapped and the
tree needs decorating. The holidays are magical
from some and stressful for others. For children
with autism, this time of year can be particularly
overwhelming on the senses. Lights, crowds, traffic,
line-ups, and visitors can be upsetting for children
who need predictability and routine. Most therapy
programs are in low gear during the month of December
and school programs break for two weeks. How to
you keep children with autism on an even keel during
the hectic holidays?
The most important thing to do for your child is
to keep his/her routine. Try to keep mealtimes and
bedtime the same. Stick with tried and true routines
that your child thrives on. If he has cereal for
breakfast everyday, keep it the same. If the bedtime
routine order is potty time, bath, then tooth brushing
don't vary from the pattern. Let new childcare workers
know what the routines are for your child. Continue
to use picture symbols to support routines and aid
in communication.
School programs will be taking a break and therapy
may also have some interruptions. Try to plan ahead
for those "down" times. Do allow some
unstructured time, as all children need a break,
disabled or not. Schedule some fun family activities
that everyone will enjoy. In my city, our zoo has
a beautiful light display that we plan to take the
children to see. Look in your local paper or community
guides to see what's on for the month of December.
A family swim at the local YMCA, skating, story
time at the library, children's theatre or a visit
to see Santa can be enjoyable activities.
Whatever new or old activities you plan to do be
sure to prepare your child in advance. Use a social
story with photos to show what will transpire on
an outing. If you don't have a social story prepared,
perhaps briefly stop by the place you plan to visit
just to let your child see where something will
take place. A little advanced preparation can lessen
an autistic child's anxiety and make the activity
pleasant for the whole family.
I personally try to keep houseguests to a minimum
over the holidays. We don't invite people to stay
overnight - just for a meal. I also lower my expectations
for the children during this time. If they need
to leave the room to collect themselves, I let them.
Most of the time, my two PDD-NOS children can't
eat at the table with people they don't know. I
allow them to eat before we do or let them eat at
a separate table in or out of the room depending
on who the guests are. Try not to have unrealistic
expectations for your child when visitors/relatives
are coming over. I never ask my children to kiss
their relatives as I know they feel stressed by
that. I have a policy of no unannounced houseguests
as that leads to a disaster when I can't prepare
the children ahead of time.
Help your child get into the spirit of Christmas.
Read books about Christmas, watch children's Christmas
videos (Teletubbies, Sesame Street, and Blues Clues
all have Christmas videos), and play Christmas music
in your home and car. Our children love to hear
songs they recognize. You'll hear Christmas music
almost everywhere you go including elevators!
Christmas day gift opening can be overwhelming.
We tend to spread Christmas gift opening over the
course of a week. The children open a couple of
presents everyday until after New Year's Day. They
love it because they can only cope with seeing a
couple of new things at a time. Having one or two
new items a day allows the children to explore each
toy in more depth. Once all of the new toys have
been opened, I put old things away from the toy
bins and limit the amount of new toys on display.
Most children can't cope with many new things. They
don't know where to look or what to do next.
Be wary of over-scheduling. It is tempting over
the holidays to try and squeeze in lots of visits,
day trips, or events. Limit new experiences to one
a day. When going to a new place, a reasonable time
to stay is half an hour. After that time period,
the senses tend to get overloaded. Keep flexible
- be prepared to move to plan B if plan A is not
working.
Schedule some time for you and your spouse. The
holidays are a good time to reconnect. Book a baby-sitter
and go out just the two of you to a movie or dinner.
You need to regroup after being with the children
all day. Take a break and don't feel guilty about
it. All adults need some R & R over the holidays.
Keep an open mind about the holidays as parents
of a special needs child. The most important thing
is being together and giving your child love and
security. Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to
you all.
|
