I was blessed with boy/girl twins in November 1998. It wasn’t until 3 years later, we discovered our son, Dean, had autism. It was a shock to my heart- my sweet little boy had autism? And what the heck IS autism?
We embraced the diagnosis, picked ourselves up, and moved quickly forward- we registered Dean in physical, speech, and occupational therapies. He also qualified for a county-sponsored special-needs preschool, which also offered free therapies. Because they also enrolled ‘normal functioning’ children in order to balance out their classes, my daughter was invited to join her brother at the preschool. They were truly two peas in a pod and where he went, so did she, mothering him, taking care of him, being the ‘big sister,’ though she is one minute younger.
A friend from a local autism support group asked if I’d like to buy a couple of t-shirts to support her autism group. I happily agreed, and purchased one each for myself and the twins. It featured a picture drawn by my friend’s autistic son, plus more information about autism. When I got the t-shirt weeks later, I presented them to the children. Dean was happy with his shirt, saying, ‘thank you,’ then moving on to the more interesting task of drawing Spongebob Squarepants. However, my daughter, Julianne, had questions about the shirt. “Why did you buy this shirt, Mom?” she asked.
“Well, the support group will use the money they make from the shirts to help pay for research.”
“What’s research?”
“That’s where the doctors and scientists work to find a cure for autism.”
“What’s a cure?”
“Well, a cure would mean they would find a medicine for kids like Dean with autism, so that they wouldn’t have autism anymore.”
Julianne thought for a moment, looking at her new t-shirt, then looked back at me and said in her small, sweet voice, “But Mommy- I like Dean just the way he is.”
I hugged her and fought back the tears. It didn’t matter to her that her brother had autism- all that mattered was he was her brother and she didn’t see any reason to change him. That’s the day I realized that I was blessed with two special children- one with autism, and the other with the heart and soul of a wiseman. I, too, like Dean just the way he is, and can’t imagine “curing” him. It would change who he is and who we love.”
